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28/04/2007 Missing TW AGAINI really dunno what's going on tonight.
All of a sudden, i just fell hard into nostalgia.
And i'm missing Taiwan again.
Missing it so much.
I was on my way home from tuition.
And my stomach was growling.
My very first instinct was this: => If I had a packet of piping hot smelly beancurd.....how nice!
And then i looked around, and stop short in my tracks to realise......
I'm not THERE.
On my way to tuition today, the weather really reminded me of Taiwan.
It rained so often in Taipei, just like the rain today.
One difference, whenever it rained over there, the temperature would drop and it would be soooooo cold.
But I could still hang out in my shorts and tee today. It just felt weird in some sense.
I was contemplating whether or not I should put on long sleeves .
I pulled out my Abercrombie and Fitch white sleeves, then put it back again.
It's a very comfortable piece I would wear often during Autumn and Winter.
Of all times, just when i though i was getting better, i'm falling deeper and deeper into nostalgia.
And i still want to go back.
But how? What would i do over there?Where will i stay?Will my friends still be there?
Everything will be different again.
I miss those days.I m iss the times i spent in Taiwan.
I miss the bookstore, Eslite. Where i could get my hands on decent chinese literature.
I miss the BBQ outside my hostel, where i could still walk out and pig out in the wee hours.
I miss the train, where they had such gracefully phrased posters and signs reminding us to give up our seats. (Please, Singapore's version really is of no standard.)
I miss cycling to scshool.
I miss my friends.
I miss Xiao Lee's dumplings.
I miss the smell of Taipei.
I miss the motorcycles.
I miss the Little Green Man that signals you to run faster across the pedastreain crossing.
I miss shopping at the night markets.
I miss being alone over there.
oh dear, i miss it so bad.
I miss climbing the hill and seeing 101 all lit up in purple!!!
I miss the ferris wheel!
I need to go back.
AT this point, i'm trying so hard to fight back the tears.
*************************
For everything that was once beautiful, who would, in the right mind, want to give it up?
Not I.
Yet, for everything that was once beautiful, who can, in the best way, hold on to it for a long time and not lose it?
Not I.
There will come a day, my memory will fail me.
Unless, I get to see the beautiful all the time.
Then, yes, maybe I.
********************************************************************************** 26/04/2007 這樣，我就很開心了。《記得愛》
作词:李玖哲 / 作曲:徐世珍 / 编曲:黄中岳
（收錄在 阿沁《梵古的左耳》專輯
天空不断下着无声的雪 而我只有思念 勉强能温暖黑夜 拥抱离我已经千山万水 每个男人都有 说不出的心碎 oh yeah 我还爱着一个人但愿 回到美好的从前 也许痛的感觉 证明了爱的深浅 不然为什么我还不撤退 oh～ 记得爱所有幸福的片段 所以才一直忘记要离开 伸出手继续勇敢付出我的爱 原地不动的等待 就算风把我的头发吹乱 记得爱是我给过的答案 就不再考虑应该不应该 一滴泪落进无边无际的大海 至少我们都活得没有遗憾 只要记得爱就无所谓孤单 ********************************************
當我第一次聽到這首歌的時候，還沒看到歌詞，沒有什麽特別的感覺。只是覺得旋律很棒。
昨天想起旋律，才下載了歌詞來研究一下。
然後是一陣的感動。
記得愛
每一字每一句都好像又表達了我的心情。
雖然歌詞好像是為“男生”專寫的，但是這種心碎了卻又仍然很堅持要把心中的位置留給對方的感覺，
男女都會有吧。
但是，這種位置，是很特別的。
它不是一般的情侶地位。
是給一位非常非常特別的朋友的特殊位置。
repeat mode 聼了又聼
想了又想。
有時候，真的很想站在原地不動地等待。
可是，我每次這麽做，總是會被推開。
而且，總是傷痕累累。
因爲幸福的畫面太多了，所以真的會忘了應該離開了。
這樣繼續付出那一點的關心、關懷、甚至是愛
對還是不對？
應不應該呢？
你可能會覺得我這麽做很傻、很笨。
爲什麽要那麽固執？那麽自虐？
I can always settle easily for something else.
I can always settle for the second best.
yeah, sure i can do that.
But I would be lying to myself again.
I really wouldn't be happy.
So I'd rather be called dumb and stupid.
I just want to stay close by.
In case you fall, in case you need to talk, in case you need help.
In case you need me.
我想給的，是另一種愛。
我想記得的，是另一種愛。
I really don't know what kind of feeling this is.
I really don't know how long this feeling will last.
But I'm pretty sure of one thing
This is real.
這是真的。
這感覺是真的。
I went on a little shopping trip just now.
And i caught sight of Tim Burton's NBC notebook in one of the novelty shops
The first thought that struck my mind was to buy it for him.
Not because of any "special" reason
But just solely and "souly" i knew what he liked and what he collects.
It's not always easy to find these collectibles.
He keeps a diary.And i really wanted him to have the notebook so that he an put it to good use and write in it.
Like i said before, we are very much alike in many ways.
For one, we are both very practical people.
沒有用的東西我是不會亂買的。
This was something we would buy.
First, it's a collectible.
Second, it can be put to good use.
I really would like him to have it.
可能我喜歡什麽你已經不記得了。
也沒有關係。
我記得你喜歡什麽就ok了吧。
可能我們都只能是孤僻國東西隔一端的孤僻人物
可能我們再次相遇的機會會因爲各自搞孤僻而錯失了
也沒關係。
我只希望你能夠記得我們彼此的約定。
只要想起世界的另一端還有你、我也在搞孤僻，就不會寂寞了。
我不過是單純地想和孤僻鬼你做一輩子的孤僻朋友。
我希望你不會因爲這樣而感到困擾。
我不知道你會不會看到這些文字。
希望你受到筆記本時，能夠感應到同樣的感覺。
這樣，我就很開心了。
**********************************
愛一個人，不一定要當他的情人。
做他的朋友，當他的知己，比一切都重要。
這種愛，才沒有壓力，才自由，才真。
*********************************************************
25/04/2007 YOU CANNOT MAKE ITI seriously need to make a complain about K.
I seldom lose my temper at work. I always try my very best to hide it no matter how devasting things can get. But let me tell you about what happened today that made me sooooooooooooooooooooo PISSED OFF, I feel bad having to show a black face to kitchen. Really, it wasn't Kitchen's fault. It that person in blue, it's that irritating loafer, that guy with the scratchy Irashaimase,that dunno-how-to-manage-a-team K.
6.30pm
K had 2 friends who dropped by and K decided to give them manager's discount, so they came in to eat. Happily, K said ," yeah! free dinner!" , took a bowl and spoon from DU and went to sit with his friends, enjoying his dinner.
AT PEAK HOUR!!!! 6.30pm on a Wednesday....with ME ALONE at DU! My order slips were all the way to the floor......there were groups...large groups...i had like orders with a "9" in the front.
There he was, sitting with his friends. Chit-chatting, showing them his wedding photos. RAR!!!!
I repeat....RAR!!!!!!
ok, never mind. I still can manage that because kitchen is sooooo kind and patient with me. I was coping fine...really...only Rencie and Rong, so the flow and rhythm was still ok....in fact...pretty good...everything going smoothly and no wrong orders..
UNTIL!
Cashier made a mistake and didn't notify DU in time. So, my orders went out already. NEver mind...small case, bring back, i rectified the problem...MRS PICK-UP came along and started to make noise saying this and that....please...I rectify the problem for you,you just take the order and go. Don't make so much noise. I don't need YOUR ORDERS and COMMANDS or COMMENTS. YOU DO AS I SAY BECAUSE I'M THE ONE DOING DISH-UP AND YOU ARE THE ONE DOING SERVICE. IF YOU STILL DO NOT KNOW THE RULES BY NOW, I THINK YOU SHOULD JUST GET YOUR BUTT OUT OF THIS PLACE.THANK YOU FOR YOUR SLOW UNDERSTANDING.
ok, never mind. MRS PICK-UP has been giving me problems, and i'm getting used to it already. No harm.
The harm.....
7.15pm....K is still talking to his friends....=_="
Excuse me......
While talking to his friends...he'll come and shout orders from outside...."XXX add corn ah.....YYY add cheese ah..."
EXCUSE ME! YOU ARE IN THE BLUE SHIRT AND YOU BEHAVE LIKE THIS?!?! YOU SERIOUSLY THINK YOU ARE BOSS?!??! IF YOU WANT TO SHOUT ORDERS, PLEASE STEP INTO DU AREA AND SHOUT. DO NOT! I REPEAT....DO NOT SHOUT FROM OUTSIDE AND CONFUSE RENCIE AND RONG. THEY ARE PERFECTLY SPEEDY AND PROFESSIONALLY -TRAINED WITH ETHICS.
What kind of help is it when you once in a while walk in and take one order paper and put it on the tray for me? What kind of help is it when you disrupt my order flow?!?!? I said 23 haven't sit down yet, so i told kitchen to remove the ribeye and carry on others first, we can serve later no problem. Because 23 has 4 orders and only this ribeye needs to be rectfied. The other orders have not been done yet. SO WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM BY TRYING TO CONFUSE MY KITCHEN?!?!WHY YOU TELL THEM TO PUT BACK THE RIBEYE?!?!WHY MUST YOU HOLD THE DISH AND USHER AT THE SAME TIME?WHY MUST YOU USHER NOW?NOT EARLIER?WHY ARE YOU STILL CHATTING WITH YOUR FRIENDS AT 7.15PM WHEN YOU SHOULD BE EITHER IN THE SERVICE AREA OR AT DU?!?!HELLO?!!? BRAINS AT HOME!?!?
ok, never mind. V fell down today. So her hip is giving her problems. She's supposed to be at cashier for the whole night. WHY ARE YOU SO POOR WITH YOUR WORKFORCE AND CREW MANAGEMENT? Andy was at cashier as usual. V can stay there, I don't see why you have to make the poor lady come to DU when YOU SHOULD BE THE ONE AT DU!!!!! AT PEAK HOUR YOU WANT TO SEND A NEWBIE W BACK TO CASHIER?!?! TO CONFUSE MORE ORDERS?!?!? EVERY PEAK HOUR WITH W AT CASHIER I GET AT LEAST 2 WRONG ORDERS?!??!HELLO?!?!BRAINS STILL ON HOLIDAY?!?!
seriously, i don't get you.
in the end, K went to kitchen.
to cock up more stuff.
haiz......................please la......please la...................
I was soooooooo happy to see 8pm. No doubt you may have hit the target today. Or come close to it. But tell you what.
YOU LOST ALL RESPECT THAT I HAVE OR INTENDED TO HAVE IN YOU.
I feel so bad having to show my black face to kitchen.I really didn't want to. It was NEVER kitchen's fault. I was slamming the rice pot covers....throwing my rice on the tray....yelling to service for spoons and bowls....venting all on PICK-UP PLEASE.
and someone had the cheek to tell me...."eh, everyone's looking at you."
Oh, so you have the time to observe the customers? Oh, so you are so free to tell me that? Oh, how come it nver occured to you that you could have done something EARLIER? FASTER?
Oh, so you are like that.
Oh, I really didn't know.
Oh,too bad.I still want to black-face you. Cannot ah?!?!
I am sooooooo touched by kitchen's patience. I think all could tell i was angry....very very very very very upset. Rencie was so cute, "Moo, take your time take your time." Even Rong had better sense too.Everyone was still nicely saying Onegai Shimasu.
That K? HA!
HA !
HA!
Still have the cheek to yell at Jeff in the kitchen.
While i was changing to go home, Auntie R and V was asking me what happened. I was so mad i really couldn't say anything.
Sigh, Ng ah Ng, we need you back. Please!
Next week, when i go to work, i'm gonna buy something to treat kitchen. I hope the two R's are working.Jeff too. Oh yes, and Auntie R and Gary. I want to treat them to something. Ya, I should buy chrysenthemum tea for kitchen. I love my kitchen people.
Stupid K.
Make me soooooo upset....
RARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR
24/04/2007 I'm a little helpless....yeah, let's just say...
i'm help-less....
for all the times i got into trouble...u guys were always there for me...
but all i can do now...is........
nothing?
eh, i don't know
i just hope u guys are fine.
i hate to see my friends unhappy.
i wish i could put a smile on your faces.
i really wish i could.
my world's been pretty cloudy these days.
or should i say months?
growing up, has been so, not easy.
if not for the smiles i see around me
i don't know how i ever managed through it all
yes, God's been there for me all the time. He gave me these smiles around me.
Please God, I don't know what's been going on. But i know You do. You are in control and i trust that.
I went astray and now I wanna come back.
I just ask of You, please, put the smiles back on my friends' faces......
Give them sunshine in their everyday.
Just like what you gave to me.
No matter how bad the weather can get
You make me smile, just to know that You are THERE!
Thank You!
I can't watch over my pals all the time, but i know You can.
So, please do.
I just want them to be happy......
23/04/2007 遺憾《遗憾》
（作词:崔惟楷 / 作曲:杨韵禾/ 编曲:陈熙）
我该怎么办 我还不习惯 想念怎么办
我该怎么办 我还不习惯 难过怎么办 偷偷坠落的花瓣
安静把眼泪流干 风迎面吹来一种孤单 钟摆想走的很慢 时间却不留情的转 回忆总是让人觉得伤感 有些遗憾
不敢回头看 我好想 有一天学会勇敢 有些遗憾 不敢回头看 我祈祷 能有你陪伴 我祈祷 没有遗憾 钟摆想走的很慢
时间却不留情的转 回忆总是让人觉得伤感 有些遗憾 不敢回头看 我好想 有一天学会勇敢 有些遗憾 不敢回头看 我祈祷 能有你陪伴 我祈祷 没有遗憾 如果我们像
太阳和雨 在天空再相遇 我的彩虹 在哪里 才看得见 有些遗憾
不敢回头看 我好想 有一天学会勇敢 有些遗憾 不敢回头看 我祈祷 能有你陪伴 我祈祷 没有遗憾 *****************
我真的在嘗試習慣。很不容易。真的很不容易。
回頭看，都是絲絲的微笑，然後一陣無奈的嘆息。
可是沒有遺憾。
如果說有，那或許是還來不及告訴你一些真心話，
你就先選擇了回到從前。
是我沒法趕上這場舞會，所以落選了。
應該說，連參賽資格都被取消了。
最後的候補，也沒機會。
我很累。很累。很累。 22/04/2007 Just today...ok, just a quick drop-in...take 5 actually, from reading up on Agar plates and selected mediums used for MicroB studies....
rahz...yes, i have a MicroB paper TOMORROW! ah wellz....
speaking of which...............
Leo caught me today after service and asked me how to write 3 essays in 2 hours on Sociology.
I was like...HAHAHA...at least you got SOMETHING to write on....or rather, it's pretty easy to crap on Deviance, Religion, Family, Gender....blah blah blah....
HELLOZ.....I have to write 6 essays tomorrow on...er...MicroB? hahaha...no hard feelings Leo, if u ever read this...I wasnt trying to poke fun at u ah......It just suddenly dawned on me that...
Science Students have problems writing FASS essays....and FASS students have problems writing SCI essays...
so......
can i ask.......
why are we made to do these kind of things? Isn't it pretty obvious that I went to FASS precisely I'm not quite cut out for SCI???
Why can't we just have MCQs? I think i'm getting better at MCQs these days...they no longer jinx me.....hahahha.....
haiya haiya....why you like to make things difficult ...make life difficult? haiya haiya....
Seriously.....it feels like I'm gonna have to write 6 biographies for Mr Neisseria whose always into dirty and fatalistic business, health specialist Mr Lb. Casei Shirota( ya, in case he rings a bell...yes ...he's a major shareholder in the Y****t industry), Mr Saccharomyces Carlsbegenis (<= yes, the beer guy...this guy came up with CARLSGERG....how else u think I can remember his name? haiz.....guilty! i drink....) , all-time hottie Ms Staphyloccocus and her family (NOTE! Her family is big ok....a lot of memebers u know...), throat-scratchingly-screaming Mr Streptoccocus and his brotherhood of brothers....and yes...in everything u eat, u recall her, Ms Salmonella.
Guess what..........................
I SPELT ALL THEIR NAMES WITHOUT LOOKING AT THE TEXTBOOK!!!
MUMMY! I PASSED MY SPELLING!
hy hy! i did it! i can spell!!! if moo can spell...u can too!!!
昨天夜裏，今天清晨我躺在床上
很累
有點醉
但是腦筋很清醒
那場小雨
讓我自己吃驚了
我以爲
哭了就會沒事
我錯了
好像哭後
更覺得不安
我說過
哭過後
我會堅強
但我忘了
堅強或許只是反應中的一種
或許堅強只停留在表面
堅強，不代表沒事
我說不出來
那種感覺
我無法形容
我内心的感受
所以
不過一場小雨
突然來襲的小雨
躺在床上
和上帝説話
時不時淚水總會在眼眶中打轉
轉了一圈，兜了風
又叛逆地轉回了淚腺窩裏沉睡
昨天的小雨
很燙
滑過臉頰的一刻，真的是燙的
體溫，是體溫的關係
我曾經說過
你的雙手，四季溫暖
我的是冰冷的
如果要一樣東西能夠四季溫暖你
我很傻地說
“唯有我的淚水是熱的。”
我天天說傻話
這就是我
我總是活在自己的夢幻中
可是
我是認真的
有些事情
沒有發生在自己身上
你當然說是夢幻
只能發生在連續劇中
那，你就當作我在演戲好了。
昨夜，我聼著《白色風車》入睡。
我在尋找
還有沒有多一個這樣的
如果沒有
我也不知道該怎麽辦
如果到時候忘不了
我也不知道該怎麽辦
如果沒有……
……
20/04/2007 2007年4月20 日 1409這一刻，我突然哭了。
我明明在念書。
是梁靜茹的《可樂戒指》嗎？
還是……
你看到我的暱稱。
“陪我看電視，給我說歷史故事“
你問，是誰
我說，沒人，就是沒人，所以希望能夠有人這麽做。
你說你滿肚子都是歷史故事。
你說你只說過方孝儒的故事給我聼。
爲什麽你記得？
爲什麽你不忘？
那一刻，1409
我哭了。
不過那一下下
抽噓卻很厲害
下了一場小雨
我
終于
掉淚了
我
終于
因爲你的緣故
掉淚了
Powerpuffies Strikes Back今天超瘋的~~~
好久沒有這樣了。
*sigh*, it's one of those days i really enjoyed myself thoroughly......
***********
yes, the POWERPUFFIES are back. Though they didn't really manage to kick some butts (especially those turtles out there),they did create some typhoon that swept through the DU and KIT.*evil laugh*
it's been a while since the two of us partnered together at DU. It's even been a longer while we partnered sooooooo darn long at DU for the whole of the peak hour. We were seriously having a wild time making a lot ...i mean A LOT of noise...singing...continuing each other's lame jokes...tunes...lines...rhymes...it's been a while since i last saw the KIT people laugh until one of them couldn't even hold the butter scoop properly and the other newbie got so shocked and frightened by us, he gave us extra long beans for dinner. *hahahhahahahahha*
There's just so much to share.
And for a long time...we finally saw our "father". Yes. It's good to see someone u know. It's good to see someone u know, still has that same belly, that same curse, that same standard of "Indernationer Ingrish". It's good to hear him call us 一份子.
but for a moment, when he talked about taiwan. my heart felt this sharp sinking pain. suddenly, i wanted so much to go back.
a year ago, i came to this place, to prepare myself for taiwan. a year later, i'm back to this place, to prepare myself for dunnoo-wad.
suddenly, i really wanted to go back. sigh.............................
please, can someone bring me back? oh wellz.........................
anyway, i truly did enjoy myself today. it's been great fun. i wish the whole kitchen crew was there. i wish the old kitchen crew was there.
and they see the two of us clowning around.
and we see them laugh.
to me, it's one of the greatest joy. to see everyone smiling and enjoying their work.
HY's right again, 你快樂，所以我快樂。
You happy, so i happy.
hahah.
HY, i'm seriously looking forward to the end of all misery when we can pair up at DU again.
This time, we are seriously gonna kick those turtles like mario does.
************************************************
19/04/2007 原來……剛剛看到朋友的MSN暱稱
這樣說
“原來我們都錯了，時間不能讓我們忘記一個人。它只能證明愛的深淺。”
(TOH,2007) => eh, don't say i never give you copyright ah......><
真是該死的殘酷事實。
哎哎哎哎哎
哎~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~哎 bringing the scars home今天早上起床覺得雙手的肌肉很痛，雙腳有些痲痲的
才發現
我已經連續打工了兩天。
才發現
我好像老了 ORZ
才發現
我的 “小老鼠” 又回來了。
* 哈哈 *
才發現
我的手機正在響
一看來電者
踩屎哦
我總是幸運的一位
每次有多餘的工錢
總是進我的口袋
ORZ
才發現
雖然真的很想利用今天的時間好好休息，溫書
還是不忍心拒絕Uncle T.
才發現
我真的很喜歡站在飯鍋旁邊蒸臉、和260度的鉄盤打架、歇斯底里地吼叫那些烏龜……
雖然累
一天短短的幾個小時
還是滿足的
還是帶著微笑回家
******
回家的路上
Gabrielle 不停地向我唱歌
雖然累
卻一點也不想睡覺
不知道爲什麽
******
熱騰騰的飯、鉄盤
總是會在我雙手留下 “到此一游” 的痕跡
每次被別人發現，都會被問。
我在想，這些傷痕，縂有一天會好的。
我也習慣了天天帶著新的烙印、舊的疤痕回家
這是我一天的“戰利品”。
* 哈哈 *
這是我一天的努力。
******
Gabrielle 還在唱歌。
Myheart'sbruised.
******
there's an unseen beneath
i'm not quite sure if it will ever heal
but i guess it will
someday
somehow
******
哎
******
thanks Gabrielle
for singing me to work
and singing me home
sing me to sleep
will you?
******
18/04/2007 Out Of ReachKnew the signs, wasn't right
I was stupid for a while
Swept away by you
And now I feel like a fool
So confused
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never meant to be
Catch myself from despair
I could drown if i stay here
Keeping busy everyday
I know I will be OK
But I was so confused
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never meant to be
So much hurt, so much pain
Takes a while to regain
What is lost inside
And I hope I will be in time
You'll be out of my mind
And I'll be over you
But I was so confused
My heart's bruised
Was I ever loved by you?
Out of reach, so far
I never had your heart
Out of reach, couldn't see
We were never meant to be
Out of reach, so far
You never gave your heart
In my reach I can see
There's a life out there for me
Out of Reach - Garielle
oneofthesongsilike. oneofthesongsthatdescribesmyverypresentfeelings.oneofthesongs......
16/04/2007 Maybe Maybe~~~~~Maybe Maybe~~~~~
I don't know where the hell did that courage come from.
But last night, shortly after i blogged that last entry,
I took on a MSN chat I kept trying to run away from.
We had a good talk. And I was as honest as I could.
Somehow, I kind of felt good after that.Even during.
In many ways, we are truly alike.
In many ways, we click the way hearts and souls would.
In many ways, we would really seem like twins to you.
But in some ways, maybe things are better left as they were, they are.
Going any further would really spoil the "many ways".
I'm really glad that this is one friendship that didn't turn out sour.
I was just being ME, and being ME meant that I will always be so emotionally honest that
I could drive the other party's emotions to poverty.
I think i usually drain a person out when I pour out my honest feelings.
Oh well, as I always maintained( and maintained last night)
I don't like to lie to people or myself.
Especially myself.
You must be kidding.
It hurts so much to lie to yourself.
Yeah, I still hold the dream of travelling.
This time, with whom, I really don't know.
Maybe, everytime, would be with someone different.
I guess it doesn't really matter, as long as we are having fun.
Maybe, I still hold the dream of travelling with you.
Maybe, you really meant it when you said you wanted me on the trip.
Maybe, I really do want to come along too.
Maybe, I don't have the guts to come along.
Maybe, you were just being nice.
Maybe, it never dawned on you that each time you are nice to me, I hurt.(But it sure hurts less now :) )
I'm really planning to go to Xinjiang sometime this year.
My reasons?
I've always heard lots about Xinjiang.
I've got a friend who's there and I wanna visit her.
The place sounds far(well, it is far from any city-like civilisation), and that's where i want to go.
A faraway place, just for a while.
Yes, I promised to travel with you, I know.
I always try to keep my promises.
But i'm not so sure if i can go in the right mind.
If i'm gonna bring along the wrong attitudes and feelings on the trip.
*Sigh*, I would rather not come. I would rather break my promise.
And I know, you will understand.
Give me some time
And I'll see if my heart still dances to the song of your soul.
Give yourself some time
And see if I really still do dance to the song of your soul.
I value you.
And the song of your soul.
As I've said, sometimes,
I dare not dance to it.
It's so unbelievable
That we click this way.
Hey, if I don't see you in China
I'll see you in India. ><
Yeah, the kids need us.
**********心靈起舞********
15/04/2007 最近不好~~最近不好~~
最近，真的過得不是很好。我並不是想抱怨什麽。這是我預料中的。
只是沒有想到，會讓自己身心那麽地疲憊。
好像除了我，身旁的好朋友們，生活也不是很順。
最近不好。好多天，沒有寫日記了。雖然有很多的事情和感觸，想紀錄下來。但是心緒，真的很煩躁。
我的一貫作風，是安靜了，才把心底的真心話，冷靜的話，理性的話，一一記錄下來。
煩躁，只會讓我的言語顯得魯莽、衝動。
那樣，不是我。
因爲這幾天，心不靜。
所以，日記已經空白了很久。
日記空白，不代表我沒有在思考。
我一直都在整理我的思緒。
我回到打工的日子。
我很喜歡這份工作。
因爲有瘋婆二人組。
我們是POWERPUFFIES 哦。
SERVICE, DU,KITCHEN(雖然我還是菜鳥，但是瘋姐一號可不是浪得虛名哦！)
YOU NAME IT, WE PUFF IT
(yes HY, "diao" *hahahah*)
這是我離開之前的節奏。這是一種熟悉，感覺很窩心。
雖然如HY 說的，物是人非，但是，至少，工作的時候，我不會想太多。
如果你以爲我用工作來逃避事情，
你錯了。
如果要逃避，我想，有更好的辦法吧？
打工的原因之一，是爲了存錢買飛機票，環游世界！！！！！！！！！！！
積少成多，聼過吧？
打工的原因之二，是爲了拿經驗。我不希望我的履歷表只有沾筆兩個字，太虛了啦~~~
那天成功被師傅叫進廚房實習了。
嘻嘻嘻嘻嘻嘻嘻
雖然手被260度的鉄盤燙傷了，
But it's ok....for the sake of learning, wth!
這就是我，爲了學習，願意自虐。
我可是認真的哦！
菜鳥也有變成lao jiao 的一天哦！
最近不好。因爲感情生活碰壁咯~~~
見鬼，你一定在想，這個女人感情碰壁還那麽開心。
拜托，可見你就是不懂我啊。
我這個人就是瘋瘋癲癲的。
其實，除了偶爾有點愛搞EMO外，
我都是比較開朗的。我討厭雨天。暖暖的太陽，夾帶涼爽的微風，OH YEAH!><
Yes, anywayz, like i was saying......
感情碰壁，就得收拾心情，縂不能讓自己不停地沉淪。至少，那不是我的作風。
雖然，已經沒有那麽想他了。
可是，回憶作祟，我也真的沒有辦法。
有時明明就是在想別的東西
不知道怎麽的，思緒突然飃囘了臺北
慢慢地，飃到了他的樣子。
然後是他說過的話
有時是他的小動作。
有時是我曾經對他說過的話。
有時候，腦海會出現那些歌曲。
曾經，每天早上起床，聼的歌曲
詞景寫的，是我們曾經度過的快樂時光。
但是現在……
還快樂嗎？我不知道。
我真的不知道。
有時我嘆氣。
有時我微笑。
情緒複雜。
所以我真的
不知道。
那天，他在MSN 上問我好不好。
我真的不知道該怎麽回答。
“還活著”。
“怎麽感覺不順？“
“……“
我真的無言以對。
很多人會以爲，這又是另一段的“失戀“。
你錯了。
你真的錯了。
我不怪你錯了。
因爲你不懂。你不明白。
可是，在一切的不好當中，
我還是很感恩。
因爲我身邊有很多讓我窩心的朋友。
你知道妳是誰。
不需要來個“金馬獎”感謝詞吧~~~
哈哈~~
很老套啊。
我知道，我有時候也真的很煩。
SORRY 哦！
還是要說聲謝謝。
那天，我和HY聊天。
我們兩個，還真的有點難姐難妹哦
哈哈哈
We are always amazed...how come so many things happened...
and we are still ALIVE.
and HY said she if she could die of this thing called
AMAZEMENT
she would collapse in front of the person who says she's strong.
and i told her,
ok,
i won;t say u r strong.
=_="
Yeah guys, we are not as strong as u think we are u know.....
u know?
u know?
u know?
So, what makes you think we are ok?
ok?
ok?
ok?
when we laugh, we really laugh
leave us alone
and we 搞EMO.
But i guess that's what makes us ok
At least, we tackle IT.
we tackle EMO.
Hey, not eLmo ok
EMO.
So, no matter how bad things get....
我們會好好的！
HY, “挂在裏面”ok...
we still got butts to kick at PL.
要挂一起挂。
要卦一起卦。
***********************************
11/04/2007 我承認我承認，我想你。
很想你。很想你。
現在的你沒有我煩，應該很快樂。是吧？
我知道，我不應該想你。
可是……
身邊的每一樣東西，每一首歌，都好像不停地提醒著我，嘲笑我
遺失了你。
你聼過阿妹的“甜言蜜語”嗎？
她問的問題，是我想知道的。
我真的不應該想你。
我真的不應該想你。
我應該說對不起嗎？
你大概會說你明白，你大概會說沒關係。
我想聼的不是這樣的答案。
我多麽希望你對我態度惡劣一點
讓我徹底瓦解，徹底失望。
讓我哭。讓我哭。讓我哭。讓我哭。
爲什麽，在承認了我想你后，我還是哭不出來。
我真的很想你。
真的。。。。。。
我真的嘗試不想你。
我做不到。
我不要痛苦。我只想痛哭。
09/04/2007 倒數解放日嘻嘻~~
呵呵~~
倒數本公主的解放日~~~
哇哈哈哈哈哈
好興奮哦~~~~~~
快點~~~~
賣塗了~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
還~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~我~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~自~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`由~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`哇哈哈哈哈哈~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`
有沒有覺得，這個東西=〉~~， 放大黑粗后，很像MACARONI或PASTA? =_="
~~~~~~~~ 03/04/2007 哎~~最近發生好多好多事情哦~~~
好的就算了。。。盡是一些讓我心力疲憊的事
大事小事 接踵而來 排山倒海
哎哎哎哎哎~~~
好悶哦~~
應該怎樣收拾整理這些心緒呢？
好多好多的無奈和痛苦都埋在心底
本以爲聼一些唱得死去活來的悲情曲子，或許可以放聲大哭，就沒事了
誰知道
這次不管我怎麽努力，怎麽擠
眼睛干得像沙漠一樣
雖然是平平靜靜的，沒有那種歇斯底里的傾向
但是暗藏漩渦
裏面總是翻騰着的亂七八糟的一片胡思亂想
魂不守舍
好想突然倒地不起
好想突然昏倒
假裝也好
真的也好
只想對這些思緒大喊一聲
走開
讓我靜一靜
可能是太久沒有搞孤僻了
太久沒有辦法搞emo了
如果我是史奴比多好
躺在屋頂上 仰望天空
看著浮雲表演
好悶哦~~~
哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎哎~~~~~~~
=_="
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